


A Handle On It

by albayzin



Category: Free!
Genre: Confessions, Haru can totally handle this, M/M, Post-Canon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-31
Updated: 2016-03-31
Packaged: 2018-05-30 07:06:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,977
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6413860
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/albayzin/pseuds/albayzin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Makoto gets sick and it's Haru's first time taking care of a sick Makoto by himself. He can totally handle this. Written as part of the Inter High Exchange 2016</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Handle On It

**Author's Note:**

  * For [doxian](https://archiveofourown.org/users/doxian/gifts).



> Written for doxian, who asked for Haru taking care of a sick Makoto and something tackling their codependency issues. I tried to tackle both of them, so hopefully you like it!

Haru is used to having a routine. He built his life around it, and moving to Tokyo might have changed many things about his life, but there are things he won’t stand being changed. He still makes mackerel and toast for breakfast; he still spends too much time in the bath, and he still relies on Makoto to pull him out of the bath just so he ends up being fashionably late instead of unforgivably late. 

Even though Makoto now lives a train ride away instead of just down a set of steps, he still takes it upon himself to make sure Haru takes good care of himself. It’s… nice, to say the least. Things may have been changing between him and Makoto, but the fact that Makoto still takes the time to look after him means a lot. It means that even when things change, what they mean to each other won’t. 

Which is why all he can do is click his tongue in annoyance for the fact that Makoto is late. He doesn’t have a clock in the bath, so he can’t tell by how much. It just feels like he’s been in the tub longer than usual. 

It’s Saturday and he and Makoto had made plans to hang out that day. With Haru being busy with his swim team and Makoto’s classes and him finding a job in the cafe to help support himself, their free time together had been rather limited to dinners where they spend more time studying than eating and talking. Though for once, their schedules aligned so that they had a spare day to spend together. No real plans were made, but they never really needed concrete plans with each other… just the plan to spend time with each other, that’s what really matters. 

Haru sinks lower into the water, his nose just barely under the water. He holds his breath, thinking that maybe a train was just delayed or something along those lines, that in any second, Makoto is going to walk right through the door and offer him a hand up, smile on his face, even though Haru can tell that Makoto is slightly annoyed at still finding Haru in the bath. That was their thing. 

Haru breathes a sigh out through his nose, watching the bubbles that grow at the water’s surface. 

He just continues to wait in the tub, the water long since moving from lukewarm to cold. 

“I could just spend all day in here,” Haru thinks to himself. 

He remembers the days where he did spend all day in the tub. It was a comfort and it kept thoughts from brewing in his head, thoughts that Haru didn’t want to entertain. It seemed like it was something that was working. 

But even back then, at the end of the day, Makoto would still come into his home and would extend a hand, tired smile on his face. Haru could see the worry and the burgeoning questions in his eyes and he could see Makoto biting his lip to keep from asking those questions. Instead, he’d just ask if Haru would want to come over to his house for dinner. An offer for company instead of a question of his well-being. 

It was safe, but not better. 

They were past that. 

Haru huffs as he lifts himself out of the water. There’s no point in staying in the water any longer. He needs to see what’s up with Makoto, but he still takes his time in drying off. He’s still running a towel through his hair as he walks out the bathroom and makes his way into his room where his phone is still charging. 

Another change that Haru had to get used to. Back home, since he was almost always within walking distance of Makoto, people could just phone him if they wanted to get in contact with Haru. Now, he spends more time away from Makoto than with him. It took almost a month of near daily reminders before Haru started remembering that he needed to keep his phone on him and charged when out of the house. 

Even though the most action the phone got was constant notifications from the Iwatobi group message that Nagisa set up the last time they all met up, nevermind that Haru is almost always silent in the group message.

(But he reads every text that’s sent.)

Haru picks up his phone and checks the screen. The only thing that the phone tells him is that it’s almost an hour after when Makoto was supposed to get to his apartment.

Haru frowns and tries to bite back the worry that’s been steadily growing inside him. Even when Makoto knows that Haru would be in the bath, he still sends a message if he’s going to run the tiniest bit late, but no message from him at all? 

That was more than unusual. 

Haru stares at the phone for a moment longer before dropping it on his bed. Before he knows it, he’s pulled on a pair of pants and a shirt and is out the door. In no time, Haru is on the train heading to Makoto’s apartment. He sits quietly in the train cab, one hand gripping onto his phone, waiting for some sort of message from Makoto, the other hand holding onto his keyring. 

There’s two sets of keys on his keyring: one is for his apartment and the other is for Makoto’s. There was not extra meaning in him having it, just like Makoto has a copy of the keys for Haru’s apartment. It just seemed like something natural to do. They may have separate apartments, but sometimes it doesn’t feel that way. Sometimes, despite having individual apartments, it just feels like they share them instead.

They’re best friends, that should be normal, right?

The trip to Makoto’s apartment feels like it takes longer than usual. There’s still no message from him. The worry continues to grow and Haru all but runs out of the station and out onto the street. He’s made the walk to Makoto’s apartment enough times that he doesn’t even need to look as he walks. Haru is breathing hard by the time he stands outside Makoto’s door. He unlocks the door, ignoring the slight shake to his hands, and pushes the door open. 

The first thing he sees is all of Makoto’s shoes waiting by the door and Haru lets out the breath he didn’t know he was holding. This means that Makoto should still be in his apartment. He kicks off his shoes as he walks in, softly calling out. 

“Makoto…?”

No answer. 

The lights are all off and from what Haru could see, he wasn’t in either his kitchen or his living room. He walks in, feet padding softly on the floor as he checks where Makoto might be. He peeks into the bathroom to see that it’s also empty. This leaves Makoto’s bedroom as the only room left. Hesitantly, he pushes open the door and, at first, Haru sees nothing. 

Then he notices the lump on Makoto’s bed.

The lump that’s moving. 

He frowns and walks closer. Sure, Makoto usually has a hard time waking up in the mornings, but he’s never this bad. Right now, Makoto is all but cocooned in his blankets. Impatiently, he tugs at them and feels a hard pull at them. Haru frowns more and tugs at the blankets more. A soft whine comes from underneath the blankets. One final tug and Haru finally manages to pull the blankets away from Makoto.

Then he feels his breath catch in his throat. 

There’s a deep flush on Makoto’s face and a slight sheen of sweat. Haru reaches out and brushes his hand against Makoto’s face and it’s easy to tell that he’s burning up. Gently, his hand shifts lower, coming to a rest on his shoulder and he gives Makoto a small shake.

“Makoto.”

His voice is small, like he’s almost afraid to wake him up. He swallows back his worry. He can’t let this get to him, not just yet.

Another shake.

“Makoto.”

Louder, more insistent this time. 

That does it. 

Makoto stills for just a moment, before one eye wearily opens. Then the other. It takes a moment for him to register what he’s seeing before him, but when he does, Makoto tries to sit up, but the hand on his shoulder keeps him from doing it and Haru tries not to think about how easy it was to keep Makoto in bed. 

“H…Haru…?” Makoto manages to rasp out, still not entirely sure if he’s seeing things correctly.

“You’re sick.”

It’s a statement, not a question. Haru doesn’t need to ask if Makoto is feeling well, it’s plain to see that he’s not. With that, Haru is telling Makoto that there’s no way that he’s getting out of that bed. Again, Makoto tries to get up, but Haru’s hand stays firm on his shoulder. Haru looks at Makoto’s face and he can see the apology starting to brew behind his eyes. He can see Makoto wanting to apologize for getting sick on one of the few days they can spend together. 

Before Makoto can even say an apology, or before Haru can even think, he speaks over Makoto, quick and to the point. 

“Stay in bed. I’ll take care of you.”

“A-ah, but Haru you don’t ne--”

Haru gives Makoto a look that cuts off his protest. Makoto, thankfully, just smiles and nods. 

“Just stay in bed for now.”

Makoto nods, and with that, Haru leaves Makoto’s room, closing the door on his way out. He leans against the door, letting out a slow breath, trying to get himself back under control. Makoto being sick isn’t routine, but it’s fine, he can handle it. Makoto has been sick before, it’s nothing new. 

Haru ignores the voice in his head that tells him that they were back at Iwatobi, where Makoto’s parents were there to take care of him. They knew what to do and when to do it. But Haru was there long enough, he should have a good idea of what to do. He still has their parent’s numbers in his phone. If he needs help, he can call and get it, but for now, he has this.

Emboldened, he pushes off against the door and walks into the kitchen. It’s late and Makoto probably hasn’t eaten anything at all today. Makoto needs food, probably rice porridge. That’s what Makoto’s mom used to make when they were sick. It’s not mackerel, but it always made them feel better. 

Yet, a quick glance through Makoto’s pantry reveals nothing except for a bag of cookies. Haru can feel his face automatically fall into that annoyed look that only Makoto can pull out of him. How he can and can not believe that this is the only thing that counts as food in Makoto’s kitchen. How can someone live like this?

Then he remembers how often he and Makoto eat together, whether it’s them going somewhere or Makoto coming to his place to eat Haru’s cooking. It was easy for them, to just eat together, even if they weren’t Before Haru knew it, making enough food for two people became part of his routine and he’d text Makoto to let him know that he had extra food. Any food Makoto kept in his apartment was likely only for breakfast or snacks when he spent the day at home. 

He chews on his lip and walks out the kitchen. 

He needs to buy food, but there’s one thing he needs to do before he can do that. Quickly, Haru walks into the bathroom and grabs a washcloth. He soaks it in cool water before wringing it out. Quickly, he walks into Makoto’s room, where he’s thankfully still asleep. Haru pauses for a moment, watching Makoto as he lies there. He sees Makoto’s bangs sticking to his forehead because of the sweat and all he can do is just brush them away before placing the cool washcloth on Makoto’s forehead. 

Makoto stills, and then he lets out a relieved sigh. His face relaxes and Haru smiles. 

He can do this. 

Quietly, Haru whispers to Makoto, even though he knows that he can’t hear him while he’s asleep. 

“Makoto. I’m going to get some food. I’ll be right back.”

The trip to the store takes more time than it should have. Haru heads back to his apartment first, grabbing a bag and shoving it full of clothes. He’s already decided that he’s going to stay with Makoto for as long as it takes for him to get better. He packs enough clothes for a few days and he figures if it takes longer he can just wash them over there with Makoto’s clothes. 

But it takes even longer when he finally reaches the store. His basket loaded with food, Haru stands in the middle of the medicine aisle, staring at all the different choices for medicine. It should be easy to pick something, but Haru wants to pick the best one, the one that will make Makoto feel better the fastest.  
He stares longer, before dropping several different boxes into the basket alongside the food. Fighting back a blush, Haru pays for his items and makes his way back to Makoto’s apartment, lugging several bags of groceries. 

It’s fine.

He can do this.

***

Surprisingly, he can do this.

Or at least, he can do it well enough that Makoto is slowly starting to overcome his fever. After the first day, Haru makes sure to call Makoto’s job and email his teachers. The sooner that was taken care of, the less Makoto had to worry about. By the end of the second day, Makoto is feeling well enough that he can at least move around the apartment on his own.

It helps Haru feel better when he has to leave the apartment to go to his own classes and swim practices. He makes sure to leave enough food for Makoto to eat every time he leaves. 

Everytime he leaves, he sees Makoto wave him goodbye. It… feels good, to see that and know that when he comes back, Makoto will be inside the apartment, waiting for him. Even if it’s not his apartment, having Makoto there, it… warms him up inside. 

By Thursday, Makoto is feeling well enough that he can leave his apartment. Haru knows he should take his leave, but when he speaks up, trying to tell Makoto that he should probably head home, what comes out instead is him saying that he’s going to stay for a few more days to make sure Makoto is really feeling better. 

Makoto’s eyes widen, and his face flushes a bit. Haru thinks the fever is coming back but before he can reach out to see if Makoto’s face is still warm, Makoto quickly speaks up.

“It’s fine! I mean… since it’s almost the weekend, Haru can stay a bit longer… If you want?”

There’s a small smile on his face and quietly, Makoto keeps speaking.

“It’s nice, having Haru around.”

Haru’s own eyes widen as well, and he turns his head to the side so he can’t see the smile on Makoto’s face. There’s a slight tilt to his head, and Haru knows that Makoto will be able to tell that it’s a nod. 

Haru stays until the end of the weekend. 

When Monday rolls around again, Haru is still there. 

They fall into a pattern together all too easily. Haru’s classes are earlier in the morning than Makoto’s, so he wakes up and starts preparing breakfast. By the time he’s eaten and dressed, Makoto is starting to get up, but he still walks Haru to the door and sees him off with a smile. Haru feels that warmth inside him again and again. 

Even with swim practice, Haru still returns back to Makoto’s apartment before him, so he soaks in Makoto’s tub, waiting for him to get back. Like back home, Makoto offers a hand to pull him out of the tub. Haru doesn’t think about how he wants to keep holding Makoto’s hand. 

Haru doesn’t think about how it took less than for a week for them to establish this routine. 

On Friday during dinner, Makoto hesitates before he asks if Haru’s apartment is alright. There’s a beat of silence before Haru shrugs. 

“It’s alright.”

Haru should probably head back to his apartment at the end of the week. He decides that he should. He’s probably overstaying his welcome and he knows Makoto won’t say anything about it. 

The weekend rolls by, and it’s Monday again. 

Haru still hasn’t left. 

At dinner that night, Makoto looks like he wants to say something, but he bites it back, instead thanking Haru for the dinner. He smiles at Haru and Haru knows that the smile is genuine, but that there’s something more behind it. Something that Makoto wants to tell him. Haru can tell that it’s about him, he just can’t tell what it is. Contrary to what everyone thinks, they can’t actually read each other’s minds, but they know each other well enough that they can sort of figure out what the other is thinking. Simple conversations can be had, but anything more than that is impossible. 

Haru doesn’t push Makoto to talk. Neither of them are ready to have it yet.

Their routine grows more strained. Makoto still sees Haru off with a smile and still offers him a hand out of his tub, but the smile isn’t as big and the hand that pulls him out holds on to him too tight. They awkwardly pass by each other in the hallway. Makoto doesn’t say much, but he still thanks Haru for everything he does every day. 

The weekend comes again and Haru can tell that whatever Makoto is done holding back what he wants to say. 

It comes after dinner, when Makoto sets his chopsticks down on the table. They click with an ominous sound. 

“Haru.”

He holds still. He’s not ready to have this talk. He doesn’t want to leave. Haru likes being with Makoto, he likes spending all his time with Makoto. It wasn’t until now that he realized that he missed this from being at home. He liked that Makoto would be the last thing he sees when he leaves and that he’s the first thing Makoto sees when he gets home. Everything about the past few weeks has felt right. 

“Haru, I think it’s time you go home.”

Haru chews his lip. His hands drop to his legs, gripping at the fabric of his pants. He has to say it. He hates how Makoto can always seem to pull him into saying anything and everything. He hates how he can’t hide anything from Makoto. 

He loves Makoto. 

“I… don’t want to go.”

Haru looks up at Makoto, and sees the furrow in his brow. 

“Is there something wrong with your apartment? Do you not like it there?”

“Yes, there is something wrong.”

Haru can see the furrow turn into worry. He could leave it at that, make Makoto think that his apartment is uninhabitable, let Makoto invite him. It’ll give him some more time with Makoto. Sure, Makoto would eventually figure out Haru’s lie. But what would happen then? Makoto would be upset at him

“You’re not there, Makoto.”

That catches Makoto off guard. He stumbles over his next words. 

“I-- What was that, Haru?”

“I like being here, with you, Makoto. I… I like you.”

Their conversation stills there. Haru said it, the words that have been building up inside him over the past two weeks. It’s good to get it out and he knows that no matter what, Makoto will still be his friend. It’ll hurt, if Makoto doesn’t return those feelings, but they can work through that. But it’s good to get those words out. Now Makoto knows and together they can move on from this. 

Haru feels Makoto react before he hears them. He feels a warmth grab hold of him and it catches him off guard. He was so caught up in his thoughts he didn’t notice Makoto stand up come around the table until he was already pulled into the hug. 

“Makoto…”

“Haru, listen. Don’t get me wrong. I’ve loved having you here with me. It felt great knowing you were here when I went to bed and when I woke up. That I could come home every day and know you were here already, waiting for me. It felt so natural, being here, living with you.

“But, as much as I loved it, we still need to be apart. A-at least for now! It’s too easy for us right now to go back to how we were before. I know I still need to learn to be on my own, and I think Haru needs to learn that too. But just know that... I like you too, Haru.”

At that, Makoto pulls away, looking at him straight in his eye. His face is as flushed as it was when Haru first came over two weeks earlier, but he knows it’s not because Makoto is sick again. It makes Haru feel that warmth inside him again. It makes him feel better, knowing that Makoto wants this as much as he does. 

As much as Haru is used to routine, he’s also used to acting impulsively. It’s his impulse that makes him lean in, closing the distance between them and capture Makoto’s lips in a kiss. He smiles at the quiet yelp that Makoto lets out, and smiles even more when Makoto starts to press into it. They sit there, kissing for quite a while. Makoto’s hands shift to rest at Haru’s waist while Haru’s makes their way to Makoto’s hair. 

“Are you sure I can’t stay the night tonight, Makoto?” Haru asks when they pull apart for air. He says it against Makoto’s lips, lightly tugging at his hair. He can feel Makoto stiffen in his arms and he feels a smug sense of satisfaction when Makoto has to bury his face into Haru’s neck to hide his flushed face. 

“Shouldn’t we go on a date first before we think about anything like that?” Makoto asks in a low moan. 

Haru lets out a small huff of laughter. He tilts his head forward to whisper into Makoto’s ear, purposefully teasing him. 

“I think we’ve been on enough dates, Makoto.”

Haru can see Makoto shiver and when Makoto brings his head back up, he see Makoto’s bright green eyes darken slightly before Makoto brings their lips back together for another kiss. This kiss is more than the one they just shared. It’s deeper, hungrier. Makoto isn’t holding back, but neither is Haru.

He moves until he is straddling Makoto’s lap and they both let out a noise of approval at the new position, but Haru wishes Makoto would stop trying to talk right now.

“Haru, we should probably move this elsewhere…”

“Probably.”

“And you should probably go back home…”

“Probably.”

Makoto laughs and lightly nips at Haru’s lips before he pulls away. There’s a teasing smile on his face.

Haru isn’t pouting at that. 

“But seriously, Haru. You can stay until Sunday, but after that you should go back to your apartment.”

Haru’s silent for a moment before he nods. If it’ll help them get closer to this being an everyday occurrence, he’ll do whatever it took. 

“And…” Makoto continues, “maybe next weekend, I can spend it in your apartment?”

“Yes.”

Haru doesn’t even take a second to agree and Makoto laughs. 

“Good.”

“You talk too much, Makoto.”

And all Makoto can do is laugh again as Haru brings their lips back together.


End file.
